The Ties That Bind

OK, people, it is time to stop making excuses for the rope you’ve chosen to wrap around yourself!  Too many people feel trapped in their lives, these days.

  • We hold on to jobs we hate because we think we can’t find another
  • We stay in relationships that suck because we think we will be single forever
  • We live in homes that don’t work for our families because we think we could never afford another one
  • We hold on to beliefs that no longer serve because that’s what we’ve always believed
  • We behave inauthentically because we are bound by a fear of rejection

STOP already!

close up photo of woman with her hands tied with rope
Photo by Engin Akyurt on

It’s time to cut those ties that bind. There is no situation or circumstance that is insurmountable unless YOU decide to make it so.  If you’re going through something and choose isolation to solve the issue, you are tightening the rope around yourself.  If you cry your way through Sundays dreading the morning, you are bound by the role you think you have to play on Monday.  If you are meeting your significant other for a date and you’re just not into it anymore, you among other things, you are tied up by the fear of having a tough conversation.

animal muse
Photo by ardeshir etemad on

Look, I know what it feels like to be trapped.  I’ve been trapped by illness, jobs, relationships, even being a single mother felt like ropes binding me at times.  Yeah, I said it, and you should too if you want to release the ropes!  And I’ve been paralyzed, literally so I get it!  But, until I made the decision to get out of my head and do the work, make the hard decisions, have the hard conversations, the ropes just got tighter and tighter!

For example, I was miserable until I chose to accept the pain of physical therapy.  Back then I had to relearn everything, to sit up, chew solid foods, dress, and wash, write, stand, walk, potty on my own, and even talk!  Every day of the pain and frustration of therapy was a loosening of the ties that bound me. I had to change my mindset from an internal focus.  I spent way too much time wishing things were different, setting goals for my body based on what my body could do before, instead of where it actually was.  I had to learn acceptance which was my only way to a solution.  Today I am free!

several scissors
Photo by Nick Demou on

It’s like metaphorically squirming and wiggling to get free all the while the ropes tighten.  But, if you stop fighting the binding, get quiet, assess the situation, you may find that there was a sharp pair of scissors in reach the whole time.

Even if your situation isn’t as dramatic as a major illness you CAN use my story in your own life.  You are never trapped except as you believe you are.  You choose to be bound by dissatisfaction, unhappiness, anger, grief, fear, even belief systems if you don’t find ways to release those ties.

So many people fight for their gender and/or sexual preferences and/or identities.  Some were taught that being truly who they are is wrong.  Some belief systems are deep-seated and some cause families to love with conditions or expectations holding love hostage until certain conditions are met.  If you are old enough to understand manipulation, yet you continue to participate, that is a rope you’ve tied around yourself!! Nothing is worse than pretending to be something you’re not!  The rope is knowing you’re doing it and continuing to pretend.

The mind is an incredible thing.  We have yet to truly understand and use its full power.  Our minds can help us through this or further trap us in it.  Just like the elephant that has learned to be bound by a small rope that she could easily break, we do the same thing in our lives.

Don’t be bound by the tight ropes of sadness, old memories, lost loves and the like.  Life can be full of a lot of BS!

TO get through it, Get TO it!

The past is unchangeable!  Oh you may want it to be different using words like “I wish I would have…” or “I wish that wouldn’t have…” but nothing will change about what happened except for how you choose to react to it.

brown rope tangled and formed into heart shape on brown wooden rail
Photo by Pixabay on

Release those ropes!  Try facing it.. whatever IT is.   Stop, be still make a decision, develop a plan, follow through.  Who knows, one day you’ll look back to this moment and realize you were actually bound loosely by a thread…

And just like Dorothy and her Red Ruby shoes, you had the solution all along, but you were just too busy focused on the problem of just wanting things to be different that you couldn’t see it!

CUT them ties, people!

Love, Light, and Ropelessness!



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