Introspection or Indigestion

I am one who stays in a constant state of self-reflection. Seriously, when things are good and/or bad I consistently review my role in whatever is going on.  I assume full responsibility for my life.  Lately, I’ve been feeling my stomach churn a bit. Well, not so much my stomach as my Sacral Chakra. This is due to an “A-Ha” moment I had recently.

During a conversation with someone I trust, this question came up:
How much self-reflection is actually about what others think or thought?  Am I judging myself internally based the external rules of existence?
OK, so here’s where things get tricky…
Reviewing my actions in a situation, and making the decision that I “shouldn’t have said” this or that is based on the other persons’ reaction.  Right?  What if I said exactly what needed to be said and exactly what the person needed to hear at the moment?  I’m not talking about name calling or insults. I’m talking about words, although harsh, that comes from love.
Much of the indigestion from introspection comes from caring more about what others think than what my internal guide is or should be.
Social media really impacts introspection.  We worry about how many viewers we have.  If we don’t think it was enough, we assume that we did something wrong.  Indigestion comes from focusing on numbers of readers versus delivering a real service or positive message.
I recently decided I needed some space to quiet some of the “noise” around me.  I initially experienced a bit of guilt about putting my needs first.  WHY?  Upon introspection, I realized that I did nothing wrong.  I don’t owe anyone anything.  The real question is why I needed to make the request more than once?
Why do we place so much importance on what others think? This leads to an unfulfilled life and a feeling of being out-of-control.
I am working on a few things in my life to calm the indigestion…
  1. I am starting with love in all my actions and interactions.
  2. I will be true to who I am and honor my open communication style, directness, and honesty.
  3. I will not judge myself harshly for telling the truth.
  4. I will tell the truth in a way that is sensitive to the situation.
  5. I will remember that the past is unchangeable and DONE. It is not worthy of my time in the present.
  6. I will not accept the opinions of others as a judgment of who I am.
I am not perfect so I will make mistakes. But, knowing who I am and being true to that will help me avoid indigestion.

Love, Light, and (non-judgemental) Introspection


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